Almost everything has been going my way over break. It would’ve been nice to spend New Year’s Eve with T(halia, but she’s going up to NYC with her girlfriends. I’m trying to teach C(indy and myself how to salsa dance, and so far so good (there’s improvement on my part) but I think this may just end up getting myself in trouble. There’s a certain tension between me and her… Maybe I’m imagining about it, but I’m pretty sure it’s there. Back in high school we liked each other during my senior year but we didn’t do anything about it (I found out sometime after the fact…). I don’t know why, but I invited her to Jon’s brother’s new years eve ‘party’… she had asked me about what I was doing, and she didn’t have anything going on herself. Just typing about this… I feel… bad. T(halia and I aren’t officially dating (still in the getting to know each other phase… apparently) and I realize she’ll probably kiss some random guy new years eve (or one of her girlfriends?, which is a strong possibility).

There’s tension between me and C(indy because I’m attracted to her… she’s a sweet and pretty girl. She’s quite a catch… but she’s no T(halia. Why is this so weird? Maybe it’s because I haven’t seen T(halia in two weeks. Am I weak?

I find myself comparing them more and more…
I have C(indy who I think likes me (and has liked me before) … and T(halia who I don’t really know what’s going on. She’s a bit of a wild card (and a wild girl too)… and C(indy is safe

Whatever… it’s just a New Year’s Eve peck… whoopdeefrickindo. She probably won’t even come, there’s only going to be one other girl there (probably) and a few guys playing video games (and I told her all this, and yes, i’m a geek… HELLO: MATTMARTZ.COM) and I’ll be the only one she really knows. I don’t know why I was feeling anxiety over this… Just me overreacting……

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